In case you weren’t aware…

A turtle’s spine is straight up the center of its shell. Therefore, their shell is literally their backbone.

So when you drive over them, you’re pulling up to the oldest highrise in America, with its glittering, flickering letters spelling out A S S H O L E, the air thick with distaste, and the cloying smell of douchebag.

Don’t be a jerk, if you want to break a back, yo mama’s, step on the sidewalk cracks like everyone else.